Letter
from Mamie Lawton to her mother.
This poignant letter gives a clear look at the warmth and closeness within
the real "Walton" family, and the softer side of a national hero,
the future General Lawton. At the time of this letter, Henry Lawton was
still a Captain, but was already nationally known because of his capture of
Geronimo the year before. When
this letter was written, Mamie was also 7 months into her pregnancy with her
son, Manley, who would later become "The Little Captain" of the
Little Colonel stories.
You
will see what a wonderful writer Mrs. Lawton was in her own right. She later
wrote many articles for the Louisville newspapers while she lived in the
Philippines in 1899 (We know of these, but still haven't found them.
Research is in progress.)
It's
also interesting to note here that General Lawton's favorite flower was the
pansy. Read on, and you'll know why.
Fort Huachuca, Arizona, May 8th, 1887
My dearest Mama,
Your good letter, with book and papers, reached us yesterday afternoon.
You don't know what a comfort it is to hear from you all just now. I was
glad you enclosed Kate Thomas' letter and Annie C...d wrote me such a kind
one, so full of sympathy. I like to think they remembered my darling and
feel for me now.
Henry Ware, is as considerate and lovely as it is possible to be. Not
only offered to let me go to you, but suggested a visit to Sallie Weston or
to some friends at Bowie, but I felt a as if I could not leave him,
now of all times. He feels it terribly, and I think we both miss our
treasure girl, more each day. The days seem so long without her. Everything
is changed for us. Nothing can ever be the same again. We talk of her all
the time, and keep her things about us, but there is the feeling that we can
never, never see her again. Never feel her dear little arms about us or have
her toddle to us with her sweet face so full of joy. Never see her little
mouth held up for a kiss, or hear her voice that was the sweetest music in
the world to us.
Don't think I nurse or encourage my grief. I try with all my might to
look forward. To be cheerful and go about as usual. I want to think
more of this little one coming to us, and find comfort in it. And believe,
when ones tries, as I do, God will give the help and strength needful to
conquer and bring peace. But it is so so hard. And I suffer so now. It was
such a comfort, and pleased me much to have you think me a devoted Mother to
my little Heartease though I know very well I deserve no credit, for she was
not only the best, sweetest, baby a Mother ever had, but I had your example
before me. I always wanted to be to her, what you were to us.
How I wish you all could have known her this Winter. She was so much
larger, and more advanced than children usually are at her age. You would be
surprised to see her chosen companions here. Eleanor is five or six.
"Buss" four and Court two and a half. They came to see her four or
five times a week, played with my darling so nicely, and were so fond of
her. I always let them do exactly as they pleased in the nursery, and the
little things did have such good times. Dear baby thought she was as
big as they and sat down to the doll parties with as much interest and
pleasure. And so enjoyed having them. She was almost as large as
Court. There was wonderfully little difference in their size. She was such a
bright, active child. Such a dear busy little soul, and so graceful in all
her movements. So loving and tender hearted and generous.
I wonder if I will miss her all my life like this. I can't believe God
will let me endure the desolate, awful, pain so long. Mrs. Parker said to me
the other morning "She was to me the most beautiful, perfect child I
ever saw." And Mr. D who is not one easily affected broke completely
down the day her little coffin was brought into the house. He and Mrs. Brown
were very fond of my darling. Indeed everybody here was and have been most
kind.
You must have received my two letters before this. I hope they have told
you what you want to know. I want to write so much to you. There is so much
I wish you to know about her, but it seem impossible to write it all. If I
could only talk to you and Fanny! Only tell you these things! I scarcely
know what I have told you, Mama. Sometimes I can't see my words, but you
must believe I do the best I can.
Henry Ware appreciates thoroughly, more than I can tell you on paper, the
kind loving letters he has gotten from you and Fanny. He said last night he
would write to you, but I doubt if he can. If you could see and be with us,
you would understand better what such grief is to a man of his intense
feeling, and affectionate, sensitive nature. And you know he hasn't yet
found the comfort or consolation, we do, in Gods promises. It does no good
to tell him of these now. He feels it too bitterly. I do not give up though,
but pray that in His own good time He will give my Henry a new heart and
make him an earnest Christian. He is so good to me, so thoughtful and kind.
We try to help each other and in doing so, I suppose we help ourselves
too.
He was afraid you would feel anxious about me when you heard of our
earthquake, which was quite severe, though no damage was done. Some of the
walls cracked slightly, a little plastering fell, and the lower shelf to a
corner bracket was shaken down and one vase broken. We were all more or less
frightened. Some of the ladies slept in tents for a couple of nights after,
and some would not undress. Others had great bundles of blankets and wraps
ready on the porch in case there was a shock during the night. Henry and I
went regularly to bed and rested pretty well notwithstanding the excitement.
There are a great many conjectures about the possibility of active volcanoes
in the mountains around us. Certainly there was a strange fire in the
"Dragoons", about 18 or 20 miles from us, which we saw quite
plainly without glasses. We have not felt anything so far today, but about
ten last night there was a slight shake. We were wondering if you felt it at
home.
I came near meeting with an ugly accident yesterday morning. I went
upstairs to put up some fresh curtains in Nellie Van's room and while on the
top step of the ladder, which I thought I had placed carefully, it slid from
under me. I came down easily, fortunately and was untouched except my knee
which pained me very much the whole day and kept me on the sofa most of the
time. It is much better now, and I am able to limp around quite easily. Will
be all right tomorrow.
I have not forgotten the pattern you want. Will send as soon as I can.
This is my 7th month, right now, so it will be very early in July, that I
expect, dear Annie's "little sister". I had so looked forward to
her joy over it. She would have been so delighted.
I must tell you, before I say goodbye, about Henry's interest in Mexico.
He owns one fourth interest in these several mines (silver and gold) that
promise a good deal of money. Every precaution has been taken, and as far as
human powers can tell, they are rich mines and there must be money in them.
At any rate, we won't lose for Henry has put in no money at all, in
consideration of which he is to attend to the business for awhile and says
if things go as now expects he will take me to Pewee next Fall.
How I wish some of you could be with me this summer! It would be so nice
and economical if you could rent the place, let Mert board, you and Harry go
to Louise, and Fanny and Alice to me!
I had a very nice telegram from Mr,. Van(?) as soon
as he and Nell reached S.F. and a sweet letter from Nell a day or two later.
They had not decided which way they would go home. Nell will write me again
and I am expecting to hear every day and so hoping it will be by here.
Henry joins me in dear love to each one. Kiss Alice for me and tell her I
will always love her extra much, for the way she treated my darling. Always
lovingly,
Mary
Do write as often as you can. Home letters are such a comfort. I will be
so glad if Fanny can get me the Pansy frame for dear baby's picture. She was
so fond of pansys and one of my pet names for her was "My little
Heartsease" or "My Pansy Blossom".
Notes:
(Courtesy of
UNITED STATES ARMY GARRISON, FORT HUACHUCA
FORT HUACHUCA, ARIZONA 85613-6000
September 29, 1989)
Annie Lawton died on April 26, 1887 and is
buried in Section 3, Plot No. 55 of the Fort Huachuca cemetery. Her grave
and that of Elsie 11, daughter of the 4th Cavalry Regimental Quartermaster
at Fort Huachuca at that time, are surrounded by old time wrought iron
enclosures; both are just inside the main entrance to the cemetery.
Annie Lawton's grave.
Click photo for enlargement
Captain Lawton served at Fort Huachuca from
June, 1884 until August, 1884. He then went on detached service in San
Francisco, California from September, 1884 until January, 1885. He
subsequently returned to Fort Huachuca and led B Troop, 4th U.S. Cavalry in
pursuit of Geronimo during the period May-September 1886.
The original of this
letter is still a possession of the Lawton family.
With thanks to Jean Lawton Reagan
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